I’ve Been Presented With A Relgious Guy and My Mother Refused

November 15, 2007

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Q: I’d like a solution to my problem, which is that I’ve reached age 24, and have been presented with a young man for engagement. He’s finished his university studies, and is from a religious family. My father agreed, and asked me to come and meet him, so I could see him. I saw him, and he saw me, and I was pleasantly surprised by him, and he by me, knowing that our True Religion stipulates that we may see each other. When my mother found out that he was from a religious family, she went nuts, at him and at my father. She swore not to go through with this, by any means possible. My father tried everything with her, but to no avail.

So may I ask the law to get involved in this subject?

A: If it really is how she put it, her mother may not object in this matter, in fact it is prohibited for her to do so. And you, O engaged one, do not have to obey your mother in this. As the Prophet (PBUH) said, “Obey that which is good.” And it’s not good to refuse a decent suitor, in fact it is said that the Prophet (PBUH) said, “If you are courted by someone of good faith and morals, marry him, for if you don’t it may cause strife and great controversy.” If the need arises to take the matter to court, there’s no prohibition of that.

Sheikh Ibn Baz

Taken from Fataawa al-Maraa “Fatwas on Women” by Sheikh Ibn Baz, Sheikh Authimein, and Sheikh Jabreen. Riyadh, Dar al-Watan lil-Nashr, 1993/1414. Translated by Josh Berer

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